When Vacuums Arrive Without Husbands

"#&*@$!, the replacement belt I ordered from hoover.com doesn't fit this ancient model!"

You'd think that the fact that this vacuum belonged to my grandma and had sat in a closet as "back up" for 20 years would scare me away. But, I channeled my inner Amy and Martha (See youtube video below) and got crafty.

I went to the local hardware store and bought a Dirt Devil brand belt ($2.99!) and it still didn't fit! Oh, heavens! So I started cutting with the ole pair of trusty surgical scissors. It's kept nearby in case a guest is choking and we need to cut open their throat so they can breathe. 

By Golly, it worked! 

Notice how the autumnal burnt orange of the vacuum , carpet, and dining room chair, pair beautifully with the yellow cardigan.

I'm so excited, I might just tell Amy Sedaris about this at her booksigning this Saturday at the Borders on Michigan Ave. Her new book is Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People. 

The Path of a Teacher

Part of my teacher certification includes  observing teachers in the classroom for many many hours. Today, upon suggestion from one of my 'prized worksheets', I drew the floor plan of the art room and traced the path of my cooperating teacher for 45 minutes while she taught a 3rd grade art class.
Her response to my drawing: "No wonder my feet hurt."

Just 45 minutes!

My First Joint

So, I saw this joint just laying there in the drawer, it was, like, just a sample to get a beginner like me started. I thought, why not? Ya know, just experiment a little, take a few deep breaths, expand my horizons with nature's plants.

 So I rolled...my sleeves up, was taught how to use this crazy looking jig...

 ...and started cutting! The first joint was so liberating that I wanted another...I can't remember what kind of joints they are but the first cut was hinged on a nail and the second one I drilled a round hole and put a dowel inside the joint. Joints get you inspired, man.

You might notice a band-aid on my thumb. This was my first incident in the wood shop. It involved picking up a new drill bit that was resting on the table and not connected to any machine. After using large noisy machines all over the shop all morning, I start bleeding from holding a small drill bit in my hand. Classic. It sliced a paper cut sized gash through my thumb, because of public health reasons I could not keep my bloody portion of the wood I was working with...that would have been awesome.  

I now have the beginning of an ankle and knee joint for my creature, a work in progress.

26.2: Check

Here is the marathon training schedule I re-wrote in a way that made sense to my brain and was posted on the fridge for the duration of my training:

The schedule was followed for the most part.

Here was my final meal before race day:

There was plenty of snacking going on in between to be sure. A marathon runner always has an appetite!!

 There are many ways to get psyched for race day. Mine, unsurprisingly, was theatrical.

I'd like to thank ALL of the people that helped me get to the finish line (and under 5 hours!)...Thanks to Danny for running miles 14-18 with me. Those were definitely the miles with the fewest people cheering. Thanks to Pop for being at mile 14 and 16. Thanks to Carolyn, Haley, Sarah, Theresa, and Nate for cheering for me at about mile 23. It was 'sorely' needed at that point. My sister, the south side transplant and my nephew Nate (who was born on the south side through no fault of his own) reminded me that I did, indeed, make it to the south side with my own two legs. They were cheering near that ballpark that the White Sox play at...what's that place called again?

 This picture was taken by my sister at mile 23. That's not hapiness; that's delirium.

This poster was given to me at the finish. Thanks, Theres...

Thanks to Jennie and Eric for running around mile 25 with me down Michigan Ave. I had the reflection in a storefront window to confirm that my legs were still attached to my body and they were still moving beneath me. I wasn't sure at that point what my body was doing.

I'd like to thank the stranger along the marathon course whose sign read "Chuck Norris never ran a marathon." If you are unfamiliar with the Chuck Norris facts, see them here.

Chuck Norris is Walker Texas Ranger: 

I'd also like

to

take

some 

space

on the

post to allow you 

to

stop

scrolling 

down

in

case

you

don't

want to

see my

blood 

blisters.

If that is 

the case

then stop

right 

here.

I recently learned that many Marathon runners experience forms of depression on the days following the race. I did feel some strange sadness yesterday but well, I have grad school to get back to now...Thank you Chicago Marathon, and good night.

I'll let my Books do the Talking

I'll be the first to admit that my blog posts have been underwhelming these days...so maybe this will win you back.
I have two of my book works (those strange sculptural book-like art pieces that I do) exhibiting (outside of my house) this coming month.Yes, I still paint, but painting is so provincial these days. Not dead, just provincial. Book Arts is where it's at, my friends! My pieces will be at the Williamsburg Art and Historical Society in Brooklyn, October 12-November 27, 2010. The show is called Tri-Fold: New Perspectives on Book Arts .

If you haven't had the privilege of being over at my place watching me drink wine and show you my books for hours at a time, then you can skip over to Brooklyn and see some of them without my awkward commentary and cheap booze I would be pushing on you. Well, I have no guarantee on what caliber of refreshments the Williamsburg folks have to offer, but I'm guessing it's nicer than my 2-buck-chuck and off-brand cheese. The last time I was in this part of Brooklyn was 2005 and I was eating organic lunches and buying overpriced vintage dresses. But I'm about to class up the joint with my artwork! (Seriously, it is an honor to be showing my work at this great venue with so many fantastic  artists!)
If you are part of most of my readership that is probably going to spend the opening night reception watching Susan Boyle youtube videos (Here's a good one to get you started:
, don't fret. Here is my work that will be on display:

In the Changing Road Map Book, journal writing and found pages from books are embedded in winding and sometimes circular paths. The reader can reconfigure the multiple layers of folds so that the paths link with other paths, creating a new network. These pathways reference rivers, veins, maps, the Internet, literacy, and the changing systems of thinking and communicating information.

The Infinity Book was originally a book about God that was hallowed out and embedded with personal journal writing. A prayer is woven through its center in the shape of the symbol for infinity. Its text can be pulled around and around as an infinite prayer with no beginning and no end.

Of course, if you are in the New York area, I hope you can stop by and see the show and report back to me!

Deep CTA Reflections

Four leaf clover pressed in my reading

Grad school in the afternoon

Grad school

Cartoon Door

Seen from red line...

Self-portrait 9-3-10

World Peace through Silkscreening

The very talented Jennie showed me her great way to make screenprinted t-shirts! We are giving them to our housewarming party guests (while supplies last) this weekend. hint hint.
I dug up some deals on t-shirts at the thrift store-local classic: The Village Discount-and Jennie prepared some screens and came up with a fun design, inspired by last week's bomb threat on our block. The design includes a teddy bear about to be blown up with the caption: "The Lakehouse 2010...it's dynamite!" Not kidding about the bomb threat, read the previous posts.
The screenprinting process includes a little work before the actual printing on t-shirts happens. In short, you prepare a special screen with photo emulsion- Jennie keeps her emulsion next to the ketchup. Then you print out your design onto a special acetate sheet. Or you can draw directly onto the sheet using a sharpie. The acetate film is placed on the silkscreen and a big light etches in the design. How's that for articulate?! That is about as detailed as you'll get on that end of the process from me.

Then we mixed up some fabric ink, placed a t-shirt (with protective board slipped inside to prevent ink bleeding through shirt) onto a table and inked up the screen! It also involves a really fun squeegie (who doesn't love the squeegie tool?) and, in this screenprinting session, it involved help from my friends, Bob and Georg, visiting from Austria. It was truly an international peace effort. Notice the ethnic tensions in this photo below.Silkscreening...keeping kids off the street and hipsters employed!

Book gets press(ed)

You might remember a post from last year showing my Computer Book in progress in North Carolina. It was an obsessive book I carried with me on my daily walks, slowly turning the text into Os and 1s.
I'm happy to report that this sculptural book work is currently being shown this summer in Oklahoma City along side some very accomplished artists for whom I have great respect!
The show, at Artspace at Untitled in Oklahoma City, was called Altered Books. Here's some press from the exhibit:
An article from a local paper: http://www.newsok.com/article/3475517?searched=altered%20books&custom_click=search
and then watch the beginning of this video carefully. The Computer Book gets a little cameo role for a few seconds!

No-Fail Kale

I know, I know, I'm more likely to make pigment for a painting with kale than actually eat it. But I keep hearing the nutritional wonders of this bitter leafy plant. Notice how I placed a complimentary color (my half-eaten carrot) in the picture above. Carrots are certainly not required to cook kale here but aesthetics count in my world. I would consider kale to probably be my most likely scapegoat vegetable. It needs all the compliments it can get. I actually think my worst nightmare might be being strapped to a chair for days being fed kale.
My friend, Natasha, has done amazing things with kale in the oven so I thought I'd try it out myself. While I think anything smothered in olive oil will usually improve, I was doubtful with even this vegetable. Thanks for some "no-fail kale", Natasha! Here it is:

Crisped Kale:

1. Wash kale and pat COMPLETELY dry.It's important to dry it or else it ends up steaming in the oven.
2. Toss with a little bit of olive oil, salt, and pepper. Over-salting will cause shrinking. Hold back!
   
3. Broil until crisp. About 5 minutes. Watch it as it turns black quickly.
4. Eat your vegetables!
   

I'm also happy to report that I actually used the broil option on the oven dial. As for how much nutrition I just cooked out of it, that's another story.

Dynamite or Dynamite Art?

Inside this building (viewed from my window across the street) was possibly the setting for some bizarre art making. So bizarre that it became a bomb threat last night and the whole block was evacuated. I knew there were a lot of artists hiding in Rogers Park, but I had no idea their art was 'da bomb'.
Okay, bad joke, but I couldn't resist. The block was compared to a scene from the movie Outbreak with officials dressed in haz-mat suits:

Check out the full article, that describes wires sticking out of teddy bears, green liquid in buckets, and so on. This is better than the movies!:
http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2010/08/police-responding-to-possible-bomb-threat.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+ChicagoBreakingNews+%28Chicago+Breaking+News%29
Thankfully they found no threat...so please, friends, still come and visit me, we're in the clear!